Naked Hobo

When the local church movie night ends up showing the movie “10″ instead of “The Ten Commandments”, the local single lads of this tiny seaside Irish town decide to place an ad in the Miami Herald for American women.  The towns women find out about the whole thing and do their best to spoil the fun of the men.

The movie was fun and charming.  It did a lot to capture the feel of, not just a small Irish town, but small town life in general.  The hopes and dreams of people, many of whom feel stuck in their own isolated pocket of the world.  The yearning for something better beyond the wall that separates us from everyone else, when in truth what you really need is closer to home.  Sometimes what you really want is right under your nose.  I liked this one, 4 axes.

I like both of these from IMDB.he Duchy of Grand Fenwick decides that the only way to get out of their economic woes is to declare war on the United States, lose and accept foreign aid. They send an invasion force to New York (armed with longbows) which arrives during a nuclear drill that has cleared the streets. Wandering about to find someone to surrender to, they discover a scientist with a special ultimate weapon that can destroy the Earth. When they capture him and his bomb they are faced with a new possibility: What do you do when you win a war? Written by John Vogel {jlvogel@comcast.net}

The best laid plans of mice and men … A cold war satire emphasising the new emerged American Superpower’s use of foreign aid to buy friends and keep then away from the USSR’s influence. Peter Sellers, as the scheming Prime Minister of Grand Fenwick, plots with Peter Sellers, as the scheming Grand Duchess, to declare war on the USA, lose and get that foreign aid. Unfortunately, they forget to tell Peter Sellers, as Tully Bascombe, commander of their mediaeval army. This honourable man does his best for his country and through a series of unbelievable circumstances (well, this is a comedy) to win. Now, who has to give aid to whom? Written by garryq

This was a fun little movie. It does feel a bit dated, but that is to be expected with a lot of older films. However, even the Cold War is over, the message still rings true, things have just changed a bit in the world when it comes to who the major powers are. Peter Sellers is great playing nearly every major role in the film. He is one of the few actors that can pull something like that off and have it work well. I had fun with this one, 3 1/2 axes.

This movie starts off with a plus because of the two lead roles, Mark Wahlberg and Joaquin Phoenix.  I like both of these actors quite a bit, Phoenix more than Wahlberg.   So, the movie has these two as brothers, Wahlberg as a cop and Phoenix as, well, involved in less than legitimate activities.  Robert Duvall plays their father, a deputy chief in the police department.  The ties that bind family are tested as Phoenix ends up working with the police department after his brother is shot.  Phoenix eventually ends up as a recruit in the police department and it is his help that is crucial to bringing down a bunch of drug dealers.

The acting was top notch all around.  Phoenix is wonderful as the brother torn between the life he leads and the bonds with his law enforcement family.  Wahlberg also does a great job as the cop that finds himself too scared to keep doing his job effectively.  The film was gritty and raw and had a feeling to it that served the desperation of the movie well.  I was surprised that I never saw this at the theater, but, better late than never I guess, 4 axes.

Stealing from IMDB as usual. t is 1939, the end of three years of bloody civil war in Spain, and General Franco’s right-wing Nationalists are poised to defeat the left-wing Republican forces. A ten-year-old boy named Carlos (Fernando Tielve), the son of a fallen Republican war hero, is left by his tutor in an orphanage in the middle of nowhere. The orphanage is run by a curt but considerate headmistress named Carmen (Marisa Paredes) and a kindly Professor Casares, both of whom are sympathetic to the doomed Republican cause. Despite their concern for him, and his gradual triumph over the usual schoolhouse bully, Carlos never feels completely comfortable in his new environment. First of all, there was that initial encounter with the orphanage’s nasty caretaker, Jacinto, who reacts even more violently when anyone is caught looking around a particular storage room the one with the deep well. Second, and more inexplicable, is the presence of a ghost, one of the former occupants of the orphanage named Santi. Not long after Carlos’ arrival, Santi latches onto Carlos, badgering him incessantly at night and gloomily intoning, “Many of you will die.” As if that wasn’t enough to keep the orphanage’s occupants in an unrelenting state of terror, there’s the un-exploded bomb that dominates the orphanage’s courtyard, still ticking away; With the orphanage left defenseless by its isolation, and the swift progression of Franco’s troops, the ghost’s prediction seems depressingly accurate. Nevertheless, with every step of the plot, it becomes apparent that the ghost’s predictions as to who (or what) will die, the real source of danger and even the definition of death itself may be more ambiguous than first thought.

How is that for a nice summary.  I enjoyed this movie a lot.  Guillermo del Toro has a masterwork here.  I think this may have pushed “Pan’s Labyrinth” aside as my favorite film by him.   Everything was wonderful with this film, the look of, the art direction was superb, the sound, giving it such a creepy and isolated feel, and the direction overall.  This is how a good creepy film should be, scary without the use of quick jolts to the system.  Use feeling to portray fear rather than gore and a high body count.  There is such a deep story here, so much empathy and feeling.  All in all a wonderful cinema experience 4 1/2 axes.

Ah, another wonderfully cheesy kung fu flick.  This one has a ton of action, too bad the fights are not choreographed all that well.  The plot is a tried and true story for a kung fu movie, a family tries to uphold their honor while guarding their sacred book of kung fu.  Betrayal, lies, murder, all the things needed to make a great story, and yet, the story is pretty ridiculous, the acting poor, and the dailogue lame.  This spells out one thing for this movie…..hilarity.  Taking in to account of what this movie is and what it could have been, well, I still give it 2 axes.  That is probably better than it deserves based on cinematic merit, but it did entertain me.

From the Apatow gang, the guys that brought you “40 Year Old Virgin”, “Superbad”, and “Knocked Up.”  Romantic comedy without being a lame and trite chick flick.  It shows how a regular guy, a guy that is nice and decent, albeit a bit of a loser at first, can bounce back and land the girl.  It isn’t on the same level as the other 3 movies, the comedy is a bit mored subdued I think.  The film still has its raunchy bits, some full frontal from Jason Segel, but overall it was pretty mellow.  Segel, from “Freaks and Geeks” fame, plays the kinda clueless, kinda lazy, and a bit uptight lead quite well.  Kristen Bell as the ex was okay, and Mila Kunis, well, I see her and I still think of Jackie from “That 70’s Shows”, so she still annoys me a bit.  However, the true scene stealer was Russel Brand, playing singer Aldous Snow, the new love interest of Bell.  He was the funniest character, though many of the secondary roles were    quite well done.  Okay, I said it wasn’t a lame and trite chick flick, it does however have its typical predictability.  The guy gets the girl in the end and, most likely, lives happily ever after.  It’s a comedy, it can’t really end on a sour note, now can it.  I also loved the scenery of Hawaii, though I am not much of a fan of tropical areas.  The setting was perfect, this flawed guy, broken hearted, in this wonderful tropical paradise.  Now I don’t think it quite deserves some of the praise it has gotten, I also don’t understand the pure level of hatred some folks have for it.  I think it was a true journeyman effort, 3 1/2 axes.

To clarify, this is the 1931 Marx Brothers version, seeing as there are about a billion movies titled Monkey Business.  Now most Marx Brothers movies tend to be a bit chaotic, this one is downright anarchy.  A general strength of them is their ability to take a tangled, disjointed mess and make a viable movie out of it.  This one is a bit too much to handle though.  This is not to say it is a bad film, it just isn’t one of their best.  Harpo steals the show most of the time, especially his wonderful impression of Maurice Chevalier.   There is of course the obligatory piano solo by Chico and a harp solo by Harpo, both of which occur towards the end of the film and make it seem to drag on longer than it should.  It is the Marx Brothers though and I laughed more often than not, 3 1/2 axes.

Jacky Chan, yes with a y, because he plays a bad guy in this one.  Truth be told, saying it stars Jacky Chan is a bit of a misnomer.  He is a secondary character, and his screen time is quite limited.  He also has a giant mole on the side of his face, I guess to make him more sinister, because as we all know, ugly people are evil.  The story is sub-par, the dubbing atrocious, and the action mediocre.  It does hail back from 1974, but even by the standards of the time it isn’t all that good, 1 axe, but only because I fell generous and I am in a really good mood right now.